Whenever I'm asked who I would rather be for a day, the usual suspects don't usually come up. Everyone I know would rather be Brad Pitt or George Clooney. Me? I like to swing for the fences. This is why I always say, as much as I'd hate to admit it as a Red Sox fan, I'd rather be Derek Jeter. Why?
Well, for one, Brad Pitt is a pussy whipped shell of a man. I hate to say it, but that is the truth. Michael Douglas was right about that one. I don't care if his wife is Angelina Jolie, considered by many - n0t me- to be the best looking woman on earth. I don't care how good looking she is, there's no pussy worth being that whipped over.
George Clooney's life probably would be the most fun. The dude sleeps with Italian models all the time, doesn't really make a movie unless he wants to, and is probably the envy of all males. Again, not mine.
Which brings me to my choice. Derek fucking Jeter. If you were to compile a list of the hottest women in the world, Scarlett Johanssen, Jessica Beil, and Jessica Alba would be on that list, right? They are also part of another list, poon Derek Jeter has tapped. Also on that list, Vida Guerra, pre crazy Mariah Carey, Adriana Lima, and Gabrielle Union.
Jeter also lives in Manhattan and is the toast of the town (although not this year since the Yankees suck).
Wait, whoa, hold up. What the fuck am I saying? Fuck Derek Jeter. I don't want that bastard's life. Besides, for all the poon Jeter has banged, he is probably most recognized for this fact:
Derek Jeter is the guy that gave Jessica Alba herpes.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
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3 comments:
Hmph, no fair. I want Adriana. And Jessica Beil. Aaaaaand George Clooney, that would definitely be nice ;P Oh, and i really like this post, funny ending..thats what i wanted to say ;P
no i think what u wanted to say is that deep down, ur a sex crazed perv :p
I can't stand Jeter...but I wouldn't turn down a night on the town with him.... just sayin'
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